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Secretivesoul




PROFILE ::Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting:: F R I E N D S ::Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting:: J O U R N A L ::Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting:: C A L E N D A R ::Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting:: U P D A T E

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[Friday
July 6th, 2007 at 1:33pm]
[ mood | miserable ]

pain lets you know your still alive right? does it also let you know that your body hates you?

my knee hurts really bad. so im going to lay down and try and nap.

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random [Monday
July 2nd, 2007 at 1:26pm]
[ mood | random ]


What Flavour Are You? Buzz buzz, I am Coffee flavoured.Buzz buzz, I am Coffee flavoured.


I am popular in the workplace, even though I am often bitter. I am energetic to the point of being frenetic; buzz buzz, out of my way. I tend to overwork myself and need periods of recovery time. What Flavour Are You?
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hahaha fuck no [Saturday
June 23rd, 2007 at 1:12am]
What color is your soul painted?

Red

Your soul is painted the color red, which embodies the characteristics of love, strength, physical energy, sex, passion, courage, protection, excitement, speed, leadership, power, danger, and respect. Red is the color of the element Fire, and is associated with blood, life and death, birth, volcanoes, and intense emotions.

Personality Test Results

Click Here to Take This Quiz

quiz
Quizzes and Personality Tests
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ha ha... *twitch eye* [Thursday
June 21st, 2007 at 5:26pm]
[ mood | eh ]

http://www.11alive.com/news/article_news.aspx?storyid=99000

hahahahahahah... bullshit.


also i got tickets to see the yanks play the giants first time in a long time... might have bounced my checking account doing it but wtf.

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i just dont get it. [Wednesday
June 20th, 2007 at 5:11pm]
[ mood | cranky ]

You tell me you want to hire me. I give you references. One talks to you today and you don't call me and schedule a time when i can come down there. wtf. I am horribly sun burned. like bad. it fucking hurts. Plus im on the rag so i'm cranky. my skin hurts my insides hurt. i'm just a cranky bitch. If i'm not having hot flashes i'm cold. I had coffee and nothing else cuse i just don't feel like eating. probably not a good idea but i just don't feel like it. I gotta eat something before class or i totally will pass out. I know this post is whiny but i feel as though i deserve it. I hate waiting thats gimmie something to motherfucking do. Not to mention im fucking emotional like crazy. god damnitt. Also out of aloe spray. fuck fuckiddy fuck fuck fuck

end rant

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[Monday
June 4th, 2007 at 4:02pm]
[ mood | sad ]

i miss roger. I cant stand it. I am not sure if that is accurate but there is something i miss about my mother and now because or maybe not just because of him whatever it was/is gone.

I want to give my mother a big fuck you.

I need a job which is making me feel more distressed.

Anyone think i can be ready for a 3rd dan blackbelt test by Aug 11th?

now i feel sick. hurrah.

maybe my reading the Lj's before during and after roger/ chris dying was a bad idea.

someone for god sakes hire me.

going to lay down.

yea bad idea.

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may i present a story [Wednesday
May 2nd, 2007 at 4:46pm]
I do not update often, I am aware of this. However, i would like to present a story of my last 20 hours or so.

I woke up to my alarm clock and then Trish's alarm clock. Then Bri called twice, still didnt get up.
got out of bed at 9:45 am.
Got ready for presentation.
10 am class.
lunch
more class

2-4 work

4-6:30 hung out with bri and waited to get ready to leave to pick up mother.
Mom calls flight delayed shes not leaving till 9:30 or so to arrive in Cle at 10:44. So its pouring rain/hail I decide to leave early. not to rush. I get all the way to the airport, literally driving toward the baggage claim arrow (aprox. 9:45) when my mother calls saying she has yet to leave Philadelphia. fanfuckingtastic. she says "find a star bucks and tell me how much i owe you". Well mom there are no 24hr star bucks in that area. I find a ihop.

I order some food and coffee now it is 10:18 pm. I eat my two eggs, bacon and 2 links of sausage(sorry god) and hash browns. While saving the breakfast desert for bri. In the next booth directly in front of me are 2 freshman, one from Tri C and one from CSU. Both have failed their first year in college. They are moving in together to escape their horrible parents. I try and read my book children of men while they argue about shit. I say hi. then start talking. The girl cannot write a 3 page paper on a 30 page section of a book. (i feel superior).

11:18 after a full pot of coffee and getting only a few chapters done in my book I begin to feel bored off my ass. I make shapes with packets of sugar and think while drinking more coffee and attempt to try not to feel weird as there are old, fat, white men staring at me.

12:15 Bri calls, Sean is home and is going to hang out with me. I exclaim "thank god" loudly raise both arms in the air. People stare. (no real surprise there)

12:17 sean is on his way.

aprox. 12:30 after asking for another pot of cofee and a clean cup cuse wtf is point in drinking cold coffee and receiving a dirty look from waitress that im not tipping. Sean and I depart for the porn stores where I see the porn i found in my parents room when i was 13. (ugh)

btw 12:30 and 2:22 I decide that no matter how desperate i get i will never ever enjoy porn. also i don't care if pure romance stuff costs a little more, than the shit that was there, at least i don't feel like a sleezeball when purchasing it.

2:23 arrive back at ihop to pick up car ( my darling Lucy) call U.S. airways only to discover that mothers flight is due to arrive at 3:03. ( thanks for calling mom)

2:45 aprox. mother has arrived however she is waiting for baggage.

3:00am mothers baggage does not appear and we go searching for a 24 hr walmart so mother can buy eye makeup and underwear. She asks if i need anything i say a red bull she says ill drive I decide against that, considering she doesn't know how to get back to Hiram, nor does Lucy like her very much.

3:30 get back on the road on the way to Hiram. I put on some telepopmusik for i know the conversation is going to be unbearable. My mother asks is i recorded this song. I say No and continue staring at the road. Mother talks about work ect. about Hal (mom's new boy toy/atm) Hal's step granddaughter is doing a gap year program in London. paying well. Mother says that this connection could help i ask how if we are not related....yet. Then mom almost demands that i sign the waiver so she can look at my grades (thoughts pass in my mind about opening the car door and shoving her out, telepopmusik soothes my angry soul)

4:10 get mom settled, park car at inn walk home

4:30 mom left some sort of kit in car, walk back to inn open car get to room where the light is curiously still on.

5:23am finish up retarded journal *head bed*

All i really have to conclude with is the fact that i have bent over backwards and froward for my mom during the last few hours of my sanity, my stomach hates my uterus is rebelling and my neck is killing me from headbanging for class. I better fucking get that car.

x posted to LJ,FB,MS
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[Saturday
January 20th, 2007 at 8:24pm]
test
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sometimes life gives you.. [Monday
November 13th, 2006 at 2:36pm]
[ mood | sad ]

so ya know that whole saying sometimes life gives you lemons well sometimes life gives you shit and there isnt a whole lot you can do with it except put on some boots and slog through it. I am clueless for my judaism final. I didnt think it would effect me as much as it has. I just want to lay in bed and go to sleep watch movies, be cuddled, hang out with my friends, drink with my friends and hang out. I feel drained. With no real mental capacity, like butter scraped over too much bread. I just want to listen to Iron and wine and cry/sleep.My room is a mess and I should care cuse usually its one of those things that i give a shit about. But I really don't. I dont think I need to talk to the academic dean I mean my grades are ok I dont think i need an intervention kinda deal. I maybe didn't realize how much this will change my life. Maybe your not supposed to, cuse if you did you would just curl into a ball and go to sleep. yea blar blarg. ok time for Nozar. word.

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yea ok [Wednesday
November 8th, 2006 at 10:59pm]
[ mood | blah ]

So last night I watched cnn for at least four hours and I actually felt optomistic about the way the country might be going. Yea it was cool to see more blue than red. Sex in the city is dumb more so i think than i have felt like in a long time. yea the L word is not that ya know plot heavy but sex in the city is just dumb. yea now for the serious shit. The memorial service is going to be on friday at 10 am. Yea my mom is throwing a bitch fit about me wearing a blazer. wtf ever mom if you want to pay for it then sweet. Melissa and I ran around trying to put shit together for the service. I bought the lonley planet tanzania book which was ya know something that would be good to read. Although i just think camus's the stanger would be a little too heavy im tire and shitty tv is back. cell me if you want.

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